Dear J,
Hello. Do you remember me? We were classmates in 4th grade and you were the cutest guy. You had the sweetest smile that even your chinito eyes (I know you are half-Japanese) disappear whenever you do. Every female classmate I knew had a thing for you. Even me. But I kept it for myself because I was afraid our classmates would tease me, and you would be awkward with me.
Remember when I had your telephone number and I used to call you every afternoon? 640-5936. This was your number. (I tried calling this when we were in high school but the number didn’t work anymore.) Anyway, I enjoyed every minute of it. We used to talk about things, like school, or our favorite anime, or even some of our classmates. But the funny thing is that we were not friends at school. I felt like it was a secret friendship between us.
Then I remember the time people were teasing you with one of our classmates, the popular one (because she’s cute and smart). At first, I was not bothered with it. But as time goes by, our phone conversations became less and less frequent, until such time it was gone.
The sad thing is that, I was not able to tell you directly how I’ve felt. I was sad and jealous. I would never be as pretty and as smart as ‘A’ (your crush).
It was 4th grade, but the feeling was real.
– Me
That same grade, our classmates teased me with another boy, which I didn’t really like at all, because I was too busy crushing over you. Funny right? Maybe 4th grade was the first and the last time we would be in the same room together.
Fifth grade? I was demoted to Section 2 while you were put to Section 4. Though we were not classmates, at least you were not classmates with ‘A’. And even though we see each other sometimes, it pained me when you didn’t even bother saying hello (did you forget our phone talks in 4th grade???)
Sixth grade? I was promoted back to Section 1 (became the top of class from Grade 5-2). You were promoted… but you were in Section 2. Still not classmates, but this year was when you decided to ‘date’ ‘A’. I was not surprised. And people were talking about it, saying that you suit each other. Ouch. I definitely uttered ouch to myself a few times every time I hear your name and ‘A”s name together. Again, my classmates were teasing me with the same guy classmate from 4th grade (and it was not fun at all).
The truth is, while I am typing this down, my heart is aching a little bit. Though I am over you (this was more than 10 years ago), the memories of my childhood, having these weird and foreign emotions were caused by you.
You were my first crush. And I thank you for that. You opened my heart into liking and admiring a complete stranger. But you were no stranger to me. You were my phone pal. And I hope you remember me for that, or if not, it’s still okay.
Anyway, wherever you are, I hope you are doing well in life. I hope you are the same sweet and kind ‘J’ I knew, even when most of our happy memories were created on the telephone.
Take care and God bless you.
- K
Sweet Quotes 